Ageist Humour

 This material was discovered and printed by one of the most outstanding gerontologists, Dr. Erdman Palmore[i]

·      You’ve reached old age when all you exercise is caution

·      On the front: Nobody should call you an old codger

·      Inside: A sexy old codger would be more accurate

·      There’s a similarity between babies and old men—both fall asleep over there bottles

·      We don’t count an man’s years until he has nothing else to count

·      An old maid is a woman who has missed the opportunity for getting divorced.

·      Old lady to a friend:  “ I had a lot of trouble last night. A man kept banging on my door.

·      Friend:  “Why didn’t you open it?”

·      Answer: “What and let him out?”

·      Time may be a great healer, but he certainly is no beauty specialist

·      One man asks another, “What did she have done?”         Answer: “I don’t know but whatever it was, I sure was wrinkled.

·      A man is only as old as the woman he feels.

·      Birthday card front:  The trouble with being our age, by the time our ship comes in…..    Inside: our piers are collapsed.

·      The secret of living to be a 100 becomes less attractive as you get older

·      At a certain age some people’s minds close up:  they live on an old intellectual fat.

·      An old man approached his doctor and said: “I’m slowly going nuts over women, I there any way I can speed it up?

·      A gerontologist was lecturing about aging processes:  “There are three signs of aging:  First there is memory…(pause)…and I’ve forgotten the other two.

·      Old age is an incurable disease

·      Old man: “Why don’t you tell me when you’re having an orgasm?                                                                                  Wife: “ I would but you’re never there.”

 

   

  

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[i] Jokes take from Palmore E.B. (1990). Ageism positive and negative  Springer Publishing Company, New York, NY.